Hum I did actually change it, now he's referencing Dylan yelling 'You wanted me to think I was crazy'
Otherwise I guess I could change it to CALM YOUR FARM or something 🤔
Hmm. It doesn’t seem to flow super well currently as “I WONT LET YOU WIN” was such an impactful line it sorta made me forget about the previous ones. Might just be me tho. That might be good? Either way it works 👌🏼
That...is a very valid point, thank you for bearing with my unsolicited critique :’) I do dig this tho, it comes off as nice and bitter which is pretty fitting for someone who’s watching the guy who bashed his head in repeat the act on various inanimate objects. Also, the bottom half of this page is beautifully executed. That “NO” is exactly what I have been waiting for and I’m hyped
For some reason I feel like Jeremy went through something while separate from Dylan, and he already knows what really happened and just wants to hear it from Dylan.
Dang! I thought there is going to be a staircase and then an altar deep underground under that face :D
That would be too easy, would it not?
I was curious about what happened in the hospital seems rundown does not mean doors are smashed and screens broken but I see graffiti so probably just some groups hang out there? No mysterious fire or explosions? Heh.
Author Note
Moth
hello
Comments
Omar
I think Dylan found a new hobby....
Moth
smashing buildings >> smashing skulls
griffsketch
Quick note before I properly read this update- you might wanna change Jer’s first line as it still lines up with the old dialogue
Moth
Hum I did actually change it, now he's referencing Dylan yelling 'You wanted me to think I was crazy'
Otherwise I guess I could change it to CALM YOUR FARM or something 🤔
griffsketch
Hmm. It doesn’t seem to flow super well currently as “I WONT LET YOU WIN” was such an impactful line it sorta made me forget about the previous ones. Might just be me tho. That might be good? Either way it works 👌🏼
Moth
maybe less of a problem if you're reading both pages at once and don't know the old line?
anyway, tried some other dialogue!
griffsketch
That...is a very valid point, thank you for bearing with my unsolicited critique :’) I do dig this tho, it comes off as nice and bitter which is pretty fitting for someone who’s watching the guy who bashed his head in repeat the act on various inanimate objects. Also, the bottom half of this page is beautifully executed. That “NO” is exactly what I have been waiting for and I’m hyped
Moth
Nah I'm always happy for dialogue problems to be pointed out!
it's like having a free editor.at last, it is time for suit jerry to emerge
Vivocateur
Smashing things!! :D
Moth
he's having smashing time*
*joke 100% stolen from a commenter on Tapas
Venom
For some reason I feel like Jeremy went through something while separate from Dylan, and he already knows what really happened and just wants to hear it from Dylan.
stupidtitties
Can’t get enough of this comic 😩👌
MadJak91
Dang! I thought there is going to be a staircase and then an altar deep underground under that face :D
That would be too easy, would it not?
I was curious about what happened in the hospital seems rundown does not mean doors are smashed and screens broken but I see graffiti so probably just some groups hang out there? No mysterious fire or explosions? Heh.
Moth
Nothing that radical from me I'm afraid!
i think the answer to that may be that I just don't really know at what rate buildings decay :') Ten years of abandonment + partial demolition = ??
The Doodler
Looks like they're on the right track...